N.B. – This piece meshes story with reflection.
‘Rico’ is tall and thin, lanky and swaggering. Short black hairs curl in swirls around his scalp. His face is gaunt, cheeks hollow and narrow, skin grey-black. His eyes widen and contract almost spastically while he speaks, gesturing with the rock-forward of his entire body.
I met ‘Rico’ back in September also, when he approached me and began speaking so rapidly and accent-heavily that I could barely make out what he was saying. Other than that he was born in Vietnam.
I’ve seen him almost weekly since. One visit to Mission Possible, I noticed him staring at me wide-eyed while I talked to ‘Phillip.’ After MP closed, a friend reminded me not to wear shorts. Another time at CUB, he invited me to come watch him play football at the UT stadium. I always got the sense that something was wrong—his intensity, his incoherence.
Recently, I finally sat down to talk with him. Here’s a portion of our conversation. The places where I’m not certain what he said, I’ve marked with [].
-So, you said that you went where when you were 9?
University.
-Which one?
Any one you pick. There’s no price. I went to all universities that fast. Then saved all the money. I went to different types. There’s no pick where you go to university. All the scores. So you’re going by score. So I scored 12.9. [] Which means there’s no university that just, I scored a 12.9. On Chicago. See, I looked at Chicago, I looked at Princeton. You wanted to ride it real sure. Here’s your score. And now. I scored 11.8. And that’s what you’re asking me, that’s the interview. Straight through it, straight from it. Boom. And that’s how you score.
-Oh, right. What year was that?
No date. No date. Just walked that fast. Scored, went in, out, three hours. At all universities. Three hours in, all mathematics—that’s all I’m taking. But I was born in foreign countries.
-Right, weren’t you telling me before that you were born—
Okay, giving me attitude. What you’re looking for you’re not going to ask it.
-What?
I’m listening to what you’re saying, I’m going to ask you. I went to Harvard.
-Were you born and raised in Austin?
Nope, I was born in Japan.
-And raised there also?
Just came here April Fool’s Day, 2011.
-Really? From Japan?
From AWOL. Air Force.
-Oh, so did you go to the Air Force from Japan?
I went to the Air Force when I could understand that I’d been drafted at 8 years old. When I was 8.
-That’s intense.
You know the [] on the border? That’s how I’d been bought. To protect the United States. Patronizing. Because over here, we’re still over here. Keeping up a political wall. That will free y’all up. Us. American people selling a []? Not now. At 8.
-Is that legal though? For them to—
If in the military, you cross over to the United States, it’s illegal. Just like Mexico. If you’re going to pay your tolls. It’s not like that. It’s a political war. You remember German, how they put the gate down? German was German. United States was United States. We didn’t lose no political war. See, this is German. You don’t speak German. If you don’t speak German, why are you in German? See, why are y’all going to school in Japan? You don’t speak Japan? Why you going to school in Iran, you don’t speak Iran? I could even go to war in [], that’s English. See, Communists was Communists. See, you don’t have the money. So you don’t speak Japan, you don’t speak Korean, you don’t speak Iran so why you in that country if you don’t speak it? That makes sense. You going to college. Why. You can’t read the words. But money. That’s what you’re going for. Money. Get your money—you don’t like it? Come on back. As I read along, we got drafted in a political war when you call over—not a civilian war, but a civil war. Between murderers [], and then World War I, and then you don’t need that. America people you see try and spy on American people. So if John F. Kennedy is in German, why are you in German? Military army don’t play. You either spy, you AWOL, you don’t need a president now, bam. Cause you don’t speak Japan. You don’t speak Iran. We come to America to be equated. Don’t flag me—no more flavoring, no more freedom, no more war. See, you can walk around here free. Japan, you don’t walk around saying that. When you get drafted in the military, there’s no more freedom. When you get drafted, it’s on you. You do everything you do. See, you said you fought for the military. It wasn’t like that for my family. We got drafted at 8 years old. You don’t cross that border, and they’re going to fool with you. See American people born underneath, for what? What are you looking at? In general they’re seeing you, in Washington DC they’re seeing you. If it ain’t for the females, they try to be God. You understand? It’s a political war.
You just follow orders, and orders say, come here, you’re arrested, or not, you should, you’re arrested and they’ve caught you. German war. Then you’ve got a political war like Vietnam. You don’t want to do that. See? [] You didn’t get an order from general, you didn’t get an order from Washington DC. You just hopped over. Now, you’re classified [] on United States if you don’t speak Japan. So why cross over? See like you go to Mexico, you got to pay! You got to pay money! And you won’t want to pay, so you goin’ to cross over without paying. You can’t do that.
-Illegal immigration.
That’s immigration. But as a political war, if you’re in the military, you should not be in war. In military you supposed to follow orders. In military you supposed to be nowhere around immigration [] be protected by the United States. Not trying to get to German. Not in Japan. Iran. United States. You starting a war. And that fence, it’s a fence, all the way around. One row, jungles. You’re not goin’ want to pay no money. Now you understand?
-Mhm.
You’re in the military. You follow orders.
-Yeah.
Cause you startin’ a war. Why, in the military, they goin’ do the [], London England, Uncle Sam will take you. Why, are, you, in, the, border, and the swamps? Curiosity. Nothing to do. Bored. But when the war comes, they run. They go, you know you’re goin’ get shot man, you’re goin’ die. So why do people do what they do? You ask. Why people don’t follow orders. See? It’s somethin’ bad. That’s just the way the world works. Then you gotta deal with it. See?
-Instinct, right?
It ain’t instinct, it just your conflict. Now, you’re supposed to be asking me some questions.
-Haha. Um, if you were born in Japan, then you moved to the US just in 2011, you said?
You see, I was just like you. I already came by. Where I come from, what I did when I’m a kid. A pretty girl in my hand, took me to the strips []. What you ask for. You get it, and then you go do it. You don’t get it, and then you throw it out. We don’t just kill people. I let you attack us. But we get called—if you go through the border, we goin’ shoot at you. Not gonna kill you. But that’s what we won’t do. []. In United States we got pretty good wall, battleship, shoot at you, land mines. [] See? No you can’t dig my border, looking for some female over there, looking for things. Where are you []? The sign says, no civilian in the military bounce. No one bounce. The college is already going. They not dead, they just in college. So it’s a great law in Germany, Japan, you gotta go again. I’m going that way. You going again. If you crossed over, then the military. Russia. Germany. And your family goin’ go get you. See? Same thing. Now ask me something.
-Hhm. What’s your experience living here now?
Just floatin’. Floatin’.
-How do you get your food and necessities?
Just like everybody else. Food stamps, get a check, pay for it, work for it, like everybody else. I don’t like begging anybody none. Not even my money. I got my own. I’m got my state of Texas, I got []. I’m a survivor. I’m goin’ let everyone know. If I lose, it’s not something I did. I be okay. I don’t do drugs. I got food stamps. And I got more friends. I’m goin’ home—I don’t have a home. To a female, you can go home. I don’t need no home.
-What do you mean?
Anywhere in this city, Imma pay rent. That’s my home. See, I like paying rent. I was born in Washington DC. You know Washington Monument? I was born in Washington DC. Went straight into the military. You know? Freedom. Paid my way. Me, I’m my own peer. Female, I wish you to an extent, but not great []. See, you not my love, I not protect you none. Can’t do it, can’t do it, that’s against the law. Against the law. To testify saying that. I can overcompensate. I’m still here over the Secretary of Defense. I still run the United States. And I can compromise with you. But in a surroundings like this, [] [] []. But it’s the way to do things. Interview, professional, girlfriend. People there are doing business. I don’t play no game.
I’m 56. Strictly national security. Protect their kids, from attackers. And protect Michelle Obama. That’s my job. To protect Michelle Obama and her kids. That’s what I do. And I try to think—act. I don’t think—act. When Michelle Obama comes, I gotta protect her. I don’t got time to play. Michelle, I play this game. I gotta protect Michelle and her kids. Don’t think—act. I don’t think—I act. For me, I don’t know much about civilian life. Imma getting paid to protect Michelle and her kids. [].
I’m not from Austin, I’m from the world. I follow orders. I’m 56, I’m enclosed. Watching the teeth don’t play. Do my family, I don’t play. I’m with my family. Now you see me, now you don’t. So I be around, I be around. I live down the street. But I’m walking here, I’m over there, I’m walking to this speed to be looking. I don’t have time. My family runs a corporation. And I don’t get out, then I’m not fighting no more war. I’m here. I still working. I’m finally getting called, the external criminal system, and the field looking. But I program. I’m a programmer in the nest. Code, protect Austin. And I been [], nation of attackers. And I got Michelle. Nothing attacks her kids. So working to do what you gotta do.
I see you, and now I don’t. Because I got no time. My time is up. I gotta keep moving. And then I see you here, now you walk at another speed, now you disappear. See. But I still be around. Checking out, I go on break. Now I go on break. But I can’t socialize with you. I see you when I see you. But I goin’ get no place if I do that. I’m a time traveller. I’m travelling through time. If I see you, then I holler at you. If I don’t, no. I gotta protect my family. They over there. If these are inmates, my family []. I got a mission. Not going by the yard line, books, and our Michelle. When the people knock, civilian female, you don’t mean nothing to me but $10 million. If you break the law. My family, they run an enterprise. They got Michelle the votes so civilians, country, you and I don’t get abused. So we don’t think as American people do. You foreigners get involved with socializing, and we still goin’ get you a foreigner. See, you still goin’ be a foreigner, You know why? Look at your eyes.
-Haha.
You still goin’ be a foreigner, no matter what you do. You goin’ go to white boys, you goin’ go to blacks, you can go—you’re still goin’ be Korean. Look at your eyes. See? That’s goin’ get you up. It doesn’t matter white, blacks, Spanish—look at your eyes. You still from Korean. Still makes no difference where you come. Your eyes still from Korean. You still born in a foreign country. Cause your eyes give you up. But you’re small, you see me, do what you do. Me, I’m past that day. I’m 56. I don’t think that way no more. I ain’t 12, ain’t 18. I’m 56 and I don’t think that way no more. I just floatin’. And I conquer people, and I will destroy. I not 12, not 18 no more. I’m 56. I don’t think that way no more. But I understand. Do what you do. I understand, you’re female. Do what you do. I’m not mad at you. Do what you do. I’m not mad at you. I’m a man. You’re female. Do what you do. Okay? Got any more questions for me?
-I don’t know. You said you still have family here?
Uncle, granny, three twins. They are mainly my size, but they grew inside. They grew in lack. Three twins. I’m the fourth twin. My momma, she dirty. Three twins. Raised four, five. All are dead. My family. I work, I stay outside. Our men judge where you’re from. Females, you stay outside. Men, you stay outside. [] People don’t know, you never know who she was. It could be []. See? And then you ask. You alright?
-I’m just thinking. So how long have you been in Austin?
Seven years. I been through a military concentrated camp down in Fort Hood. I had a hard time taking off. I hit the army in the face. I was goin’ to Fort Lauderdale on an expedition, where I’m allowed to take seven people. I wasn’t goin’ out there to kill, I just went in there on expedition. Just tell em’ when we need to do, then get out. That’s it. Some people take pictures, find out what’s goin’ on, and go out, and eat. Take pictures, that’s it. Not to kill people. Just going out to take picture. For military []. We don’t need a whole army to go in. That was way before your time. Just go in, take pictures, boom boom boom boom, and come out. There was a lot. so I just continued my expedition. I be goin’ there. Anything else?
-Is there anything that you regret in your life?
Not really. I’m just floatin’. I follow orders. When I come from the United States, I don’t fool with it no more. I follow orders. I fought in my time. But when I come to the United States, I’m finished. I’m not doin’ no more fightin’. So I can do that more. I’m just goin’ get on with my family, I’m not fightin’ no more—everything I like to do, I’m doin’ that. Doin’ the same thing. Your job []. I’m not fightin’ no more because if you []. I’m not doin’ nothin’ else. I’m not fightin’ no more. I ain’t doin’ nothin’ more. I been the chief, so the city of Austin []. I get paid, get paid. I survive, nothin’ like that. I ain’t doin’ nothin’ more. The city, the county—I’m not fightin’ nothin’ else. I’m not doin’ nothin’ else. I’m chillin’. Imma spend time with my family. They goin’ violate the rules, I’m not fightin’ no more. I’m the chief, I ain’t movin’ no more. Want to go to the army, violate the protocol—I ain’t fightin’ no more. []. I not fightin’ no more. That’s it. Go there to my trader, buy me a car, get paid, get paid. That’s it. I’m here so they can validate the votes. And the marathon. I’m not fightin’ no more. I been here, I validate the votes. Got the city right, got the county right, got the state right, that’s it. I been to jail, get paid, get paid, and ain’t doin’ nothin’ else. So I got to validate the votes. That’s validating, and they stay in Austin. If you ain’t in Austin, then you’re a visitor. That’s validating. See, you from Waco, but you vote in Austin. That’s validation. See, only Austin vote in Austin. Outside, you can’t vote in Austin. Whether you from Virginia, Waco, that’s validating. You got to be born and raised in Austin to vote. That’s validation. That’s it. Already got the program. ZIP code. Austin, vote in Austin, you was born and raised, vote. Not outside, not refugees, not poverty. People from Austin vote. Anything else?
-No, I think I’m good. Thank you.
The next time I saw him—the following week—he told me he’s moving. He’s moving to play football for Georgia Tech. He invited me to come watch the games sometimes when I’m not busy. I half-heartedly agreed.
I think I definitely could have handled these conversations better, with more patience—and I haven’t yet found out what has really happened to him. Where he’s really from. But it’s a fact that mental illness is prevalent among the homeless, simply because it’s so easy for people with mental illness to become homeless.
Here’s an excerpt from a report titled “Mental Illness and Homelessness,” published by the National Coalition for the Homeless in 2009.
“According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, 20 to 25% of the homeless population in the United States suffers from some form of severe mental illness. In comparison, only 6% of Americans are severely mentally ill (National Institute of Mental Health, 2009). In a 2008 survey performed by the U.S. Conference of Mayors, 25 cities were asked for the three largest causes of homelessness in their communities. Mental illness was the third largest cause of homelessness for single adults (mentioned by 48% of cities). For homeless families, mental illness was mentioned by 12% of cities as one of the top 3 causes of homelessness.”
The full report can be accessed here.
I’ll be doing more research on what’s being done to help the homeless from the mental illness side. And what we can do to contribute.